I am 22 and have been dealing with herpes for about 3 years now. It happened when I was in a new relationship during oral sex, I couldn’t believe it had happened to me and I still can’t now, I felt although my life had come crushing down and everyone was looking at me different and looked down on me. I broke up with the guy and have never looked back as I feel so much resent towards him. Everything changed from that day and I thought I could never have a trusting relationship again..
I have now been in a relationship for just over a year and a half. I carried on as normal and protected him from getting it or knowing about it.
As our relationship progressed and got more serious, I felt the need to talk to him about it after 1 year, yes it was the scariest thing ever, but I knew I could trust him and thought that if he wanted to just up and leave then I would completely understand.
However, to my surprise he didn’t even flinch when I gave him the news, he loves me and it doesn’t change anything he said!
Now we are engaged and he cares so much for me, at first he was more intrigued and asked so many questions about it, which some of them I didn’t even know the answers too! And now he looks after me and even looks to see if the flare up has gone, sometimes even blowing on the sores for me! He has literally made me feel like a princess which I thought I would never get again.
I think looking back to how low and disgusted I felt towards myself, I have now over come the feeling of being ‘dirty’. Its made me the strongest I have ever been! People don’t understand it unless they have it I think. (Unless your a doctor obviously ha)
We just need to remember that, at first it’s the scariest most painful thing ever, but every year it does get better and I hope that when people read this, there is hope for everyone to find trust in someone they want to be with and find it in them to talk to their partner!
We are now trying for a baby but recently miscarried.. But during the midwife chat I had to explain about herpes to her and my fiancé was so understanding and helped me finally bring myself to say it. It’s really not that bad now and knowing that my friends and him can treat me exactly the same as everyone else, makes me feel even more loved then before.
I’m proud of what I have been through because it’s made me the person I am today.